I have plants. I have had plants for a really long time. As of late, I have felt defeatist about my plants; I saw them be so fruitful over the summer while outside, and when I brought in a select few, they dwindled. I lost my sage plant, and came close to losing my mint. I felt like, "what's the point? They don't like it inside, let them die." And I ignored them. I didn't water them. And they looked sadder and sadder. Consequently, among all the dead leaves there rose a dust problem, as well as a small insect infestation (except for the one VERY large moth that hatched somewhere in the house, presumably from the sunflowers we brought in to harvest and left in the basement....yes, I have a lot to learn). This morning as I took stock of the state of affairs in plant-land, I saw the sun peek out behind the clouds. I decided that the root systems of all the plants (except the sage...sniff! I LOVED the sage; I named my blog after it!) were all still intact, and that my plants needed (as well as deserved) a little TLC. I set out to remove all the dead leaves off all the plants, and then decided I should cut off all dead parts to give the living parts a chance. I got out a pair of scissors and a box from Christmas for all the debris. I started with the mint. It was like watching Wall-E. So much dead, I just pulled it over the side and snipped it. I was snipping along when I noticed that there was, in fact, new growth under all the death. This poor plant had been trying to break through the barrier of death and malnurishment to prove that it was, in fact, still living. This gave me new resolve to attend to all the rest of my plants as well.
I spent the morning trimming, feeling bad for letting things go so long, and hoping that out of this extreme cut back, new life would be able to thrive. Of course, as typically happens with gardening, I started thinking about my life. As the new year comes (I have never been one to make resolutions at New Year's...it seemed a losing battle, and the beginning of the year always felt like September, due to my birthday, and school, etc), how fitting that I trim back the death that surrounds me? Do I feel like I am a plant that thrived outside, but now that I am inside (am I inside?) I am withering? I look at my plants now, and I still feel a bit sad, but they are cut back, neat, there is no layer of dust and dead leaves sitting on their soil, they are very Feng Shui. I know that they will have a chance to live now, new growth can come; they won't have to use all their resources trying to nourish a dead branch or rotting pepper. I think about the things that I could cut out in my life; each of us has them, though no doubt they are different. I am slightly addicted to the food network, and HGTV. I could probably stand to spend time with my boyfriend or myself, rather than staring at the TV. It has become a friend, which can't be good. Also, I hold on to things that I suppressed, such as feelings that arose from an unfortunate incident about this time last year. I go through my life imagining that I have simply forgotten it, when I know I haven't. Those are dead things; it does me no good to hang on to them, even subconsciously. And the trouble with supression is, while it can be a helpful tool at the time, in time you forget the good stuff too, because you do not allow yourself to think about any of it. How many memories have I lost? How would I know?
It was a strange feeling, trimming the plants, wondering if I could be so much more than I am if I could just trim back and be nourished properly. Have you ever had that? You do the most mundane thing, and suddenly you have a new perspective on your life? Like the sheep who gets sheared; no doubt the first time they are frightened, and I am sure they always dread it a little bit, but it grows back, and they are still alive. That sheep could well have become veal or mutton. Maybe the sheep focuses too much on the negative, or the fear, or the death, and not enough on the fact that, even after a full shearing, they are able to go back out on the brae and eat the grass, wander around, and be sheep. Full, satisfied sheep, living to their potential, whatever that may be. It may be a little cold at first, but adapting to the elements comes with the territory.
So that is my thought today. Perhaps I need to see myself as a plant, and realize that I may be malnourished or self-neglected. Perhaps I could trim out the things that inhibit me from my full potential and see that in order for new growth to occur, the dusty, dead leaves need to be shaken off, and my wool sheared, so that I can live the life I was meant to. Live (I hate ending sentences with prepositions). I just hope that the shearer or the trimmer doesn't have allergies to my dust, as it can really irritate the sinuses!
It would appear that this is a crossover Blog Post for Sage Grasshopper and Wandersheep. Sorry!
Today's song of the Day:
Looks Like Love, by Need to Breathe
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